The Unforgivable Sin of Selfishness

And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it.... Genesis 1:28

Some of the Van and Buna George family 1985

My wife and I often walk first thing in the morning through the hills that surround our house in Flagstaff, Arizona. This morning as we walked our  conversation turned to the changes we have seen in our society in just our lifetimes. It wasn't the information age or the computers that amazed us but the revolution that had taken place in the foundations of civilization. It was the sudden destruction of the family and in turn the institutions that are based upon it. We both grew up in large families. I had 4 siblings and LeeOra had six. Now few families have even two children that is if the couple even bothers to get married in the first place. How did something as important, as fundamental as the family get tossed on the trash heap of society?

Lest you think I am overreacting look at what is happening around us let us look at some history and demographics of the American family. I am in my 50s but you don't have to be as old as I am to see the desperate plight of the American family and the fractured foundations of our nation that are the results.

In 1950 78 percent of U.S. households were married couples. By 1970 that was down to 69 percent and by 2000 it was all they way down to 52 percent. Not only has the percentage of married couples gone done, but those who are married are not having kids. Forty five percent of U.S. households had children in 1970. Then it dropped to 35 percent in 1990 and by 2003 only 32 percent of U.S. households had children living in them. Millions of people have simply decided not to get married and not to have children, and that number is growing.

Consider these stats: “In 1957, more than half of Americans viewed someone who did not want to get married as someone who was selfish, immature, peculiar or morally flawed. By 1976, fewer than one-third of a similar sample held such views.” That attitude translates into fewer and fewer children being born. The U.S. fertility rate during the height of the Baby Boom, in the late 1950s was 3.5 but dropped all the way down to only 1.8 births in the birth controlled, hedonistic, no fault divorce 1970s. That is below the rate by which a nation can sustain itself. There has been a slight increase, up to between 2.0 and 2.1 in early 2000s but that is still a dramatic decrease from the 1950s and probably any other time in history.

What has caused such a dramatic decrease in the traditional family and their children? I believe the answer is selfishness, and in this case unforgivable selfishness.

We are now a people who seek recreation, entertainment and pleasure for ourselves above all other things. I am constantly shocked by young couples who don't care to get married but choose to co-habitat or as my Mom would say, “shack up.” That to me is a better word because it conjures the image of amoral animals breeding in a shed. And that seems to be what we have become animals, only wanted ease and pleasure but no responsibilities and no thought for tomorrow or the world we will leave behind. Birth control is cheap and abortion is readily available while marriage is a commitment that impinges upon our time and desires for self-fulfillment.

Even couples who do get married are putting off having children until they are in there late 30s or 40s. Their own “needs” must come first. Education, a home they own (Lord forbid if they bring a child into a rented home) a nice car (or 2 or 3), a job with all the perks and promotions that only 10 or 15 years of loyal service can bring. They choose to have time to party and socialize like college co-eds until they are in their 40s because children would cramp their style and stop them from having so much self-centered fun.

They are selfishness. They think only of themselves and thought them we have become an egocentric society, unable to see beyond the sphere of our own existence, unable to do anything more than contemplate our own belly buttons and stroke our own pleasure centers.

This is an unforgivable sin. Unforgivable because the selfish person never realizes it is a sin until it is to late  and therefore never asks to be forgiven. It is unforgivable because it means the slow death of our future generations, our neighborhoods, our cities, our churches and our nations. Unforgivable because it robs us of the greatest gifts that life can give. The gift of loving, caring and sacrificing for another, especially that other that springs to life from us, our dreams and our hopes and then goes on to to their own dreams and hopes because we gave ourselves.

Who can you seek forgiveness from if at the end of a selfish life, you realize too late that there is and always was only you?